Open letter to all mansplainers: Thank you.

Dear Mansplainers, 

On behalf of all women everywhere, thank you. I don’t know what us feeble and utterly incompetent creatures would do without your profound explanations of every single topic to ever exist. 

It amazes me how you can know so much about everything. I didn’t know people could be experts in so many fields, but I guess I was wrong. I am a woman after all, what can you expect!

I would like to take this time to now personally thank a mansplainer who, out of the goodness of his heart, sacrificed his time and patience to explain so many difficult concepts to me.

I thought I knew what satire was before, thanks to Ralph, I now know how wrong I was. I would like to apologize for my stupidity and hope Ralph, if you can take time out of your busy schedule helping women, please forgive me and my pea-size woman brain. 

Furthermore, I would like to thank Ralph for explaining to me what mansplaining is. Funnily enough, it sounded a lot like what he was doing but what would I know? Unfortunately, my delicate genetic make-up makes me incapable of being right about anything. Long live the patriarchy!