Excellence in Media Since 3 B.C.
Thursday evening, a girl with oddly specific titles for her Spotify playlist, 18, was named the prime suspect in a 2019 murder of four that took place in Los Angeles. … Read More
This morning, in a leaked email directed at the Screen Actor’s Guild, Scotland prime minister Nicola Sturgeon revealed her frustration with “another Hollywood cliche gone too far,” that is, bagpipes. … Read More
Apple has many emojis. There’s my personal favorite, the hedgehog. There’s a cheeseburger. There’s even a kite. Seriously. So, imagine my reaction when I found out that the world’s favorite … Read More
This week, our London reporters have come across a troubling report. U.K. Prime Minister Boris Johnson, the 2020 world’s sexiest man, has quit his job in Parliament in favor of … Read More
Lester Bumpkins, a recently-divorced watchmaker from Missouri, rarely makes mistakes. This past Monday, however, Bumpkins mistakenly downloaded TikTok, assuming it was a dating app for fellow watchmakers. “I was hoping … Read More
Springfield, IL — Gary Fleming, 37, hurls Libertarian propaganda at passersby.
Here’s the game: guess which character from America’s favorite mediocre sitcom we hate the most based on the following hints It’s not Jim He has an on-and-off, intimate relationship with … Read More
After exposing the latest Rudy Giuliani scandal, Borat certainly made a name for himself. Clearly, he made a big splash, because President Donald Trump will replace Giuliani with Borat himself. … Read More
In recent months, Amish people have seemingly disappeared, leading many to speculate as to whether or not they actually exist or have existed. Surprisingly, as we’ve found through an extensive … Read More
There are some animals that just weren’t meant to exist. One of these animals, sent directly from Hell as a punishment for sinners, is the squirrel. The Rutabaga decided to … Read More
